I sat at the opposite end of the table. Right across one with whom I have not been in touch in a long while. It felt easier to avoid her penetrating gaze. As I remembered amidst my struggle, while trying to avoid her occasional but persistent glances upon me.
There was once a time when I would stare back into her eyes. I’d dance with anticipation whenever she called my name. I smile as I recall that she had different names for me, A different one for each notable event in my life. Each of them, a sound so soothing to my ears, Brought a deep seated certainty in my soul. Like an anchor that sank deep to the bottom of my heart, Her calls had a ring of purpose to them
Amidst life’s hustle and bustle, The rollercoaster of different emotions, And nothing so special in my day except a hope for another, A thought of Destiny would be a new light. She shaped my perspective all the time, changed the way I saw life. She formed my dreams every night. She was like a smoldering fire that burned within my bones. I’d hear her voice in a tunnel and not only see light, But be strengthened to soar. Like an eagle, I’d let the wind of vision and determination guide my wings. With her on my mind, my battles with uncertainty were always a win.
Now loosing some of that regret I felt when I first saw her seated at the table, I am made to see;
A flood of memories, A passion I once had, Dreams that I once dreamed, The exuberance of youth that heated up my blood, Time I once felt I had a lot of or could have made better use of, Adventures I was ready to embrace, A calling I never lost sight of, Mountains I’d have climbed and overcome – just for her.
But what happened to us? What happened to me? Does she still feel the same way? Does Destiny still believe in me? How can she? I’ve lost faith in myself. Can we once again be in love, in sync, inseparable as we once were? Or is life too busy now?
Well, life has been busy for a while now, hasn’t it? I’ve got a job now. I’ve got several applications to complete. I’ve got several activities. I’m studying. I’m “adulting”.
Can we really make this work again? With everything calling for my attention I’m afraid I’ll disappoint you again. Afraid I’ll start the fire and not keep it burning, like I have done for the past few years. I wouldn’t know where to start from.
My head finally raised and my lips agape, I’m feeling ready to give the excuses that I had prepared But what’s left of my doubts crumble under her assuring smile As she says to me,
Time flies but you’ve not lost as much of it as you think You may be older but you are not old and I, well, I haven’t aged much. Let’s start again from where we left off I’m just glad to have you back Now let’s dream again.
With her fingers locked in mine, I’m urged to dance with her.
“Dance with me”, she says, “and let me lead this time. For I am the better dancer.”
I smile as we play Two-to-Tango. Oh boy, She really is the best dancer! Following her lead makes me look like I know what I’m doing. Maybe I can do this after all. Maybe there is hope!
I hear these words and I’m once again strengthened as I remember, That I had a dream, I still have a dream. Only this time, it’d stop being just a dream. I’ll chase you down, Destiny. My Destiny, To the ends of the earth. The same way you’ve never left I now realize, that for as long as I’m breathing… I am because you are. And you are the only tomorrow worth fighting for.
To the dreamers out here shall we think upon this?
Are you living your best life? What does that even mean to you – best life? When last did you think of nothing more that you thought of purpose? When was the last time you sought nothing more than fulfilment? When last did you chase down your WHY? When was the last time you didn’t only think about you.
In all stages of life, the only thing that is “do or die” is purpose. We have roles to play in God’s grand plan for the world and the church. Outside of this, we might as well cease to exist, for there’s not much left to live for.